The Trump-Vance presidency will affect my black children

I woke up on November 5 and immediately checked the number of votes. The numbers didn’t seem to add up. I stared at my phone in disbelief and wondered, as many of us did, How did it happen — again?

I went to my bathroom to put in my contact lenses. My 8 year old, the youngest of four, ran into my bathroom with big brown eyes. “Mom, do you know about the election?” I nodded my head.

I’ll never forget what she said next. “How did he win when he never says anything nice?”

All I could say was “I don’t know.” Because how do I tell my smart, beautiful, inclusive, energetic little black girl that millions of people voted against someone who looks like her, and instead chose to vote for a man who thrives on lies, insults, abuse and division?

Parents know that young children tend to think in black and white. People are considered “good” or “bad”, “safe” or “unsafe” or, in this case, “nice” or “mean”. Yet, in this election, adults seemed to categorize the candidates the same way. In my opinion, a vote for Trump was a vote for racism, sexism, ableism, sexual and verbal abuse, homophobia, death threats and more.

Over the past few weeks, I have spent much of my time on social media – a decent following across platforms – advocating the choice of Kamala Harris and Tim Waltz. As a Christian mother of four Black and adopted childrena two-time breast cancer survivor and facilitator of a large, local and diverse adoption and foster care support group, I feel strongly that Harris would be the best candidate to represent the inclusion, empathy and progress that our country desperately needs.

My family embodies several elements that Trump and Vance not only oppose, but openly hate. We are multiracial. I did not give birth to my children. I am a less-than-ideal woman (no breasts, thanks to cancer) for a president-elect who openly and unabashedly ranks women based on their looks. Several of us are disabled. We also rely on the public school to provide some of our children with the IEPs they need to access their education. We live in a liberal state, the first to ban book banning.

I have shared with my children the various clues along the campaign trail that show Trump is nothing like the person our faith calls us to be. I’m not going to push my faith on anyone when I share this. Rather, I want to share why we were so opposed to a Trump-Vance presidency.

The Bible teaches Christians to love God and love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Our neighbor is anyone who is not us. The Bible also tells us to be “salt and light,” to care for “the least of these” (people in need), and to “seek justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with God.”

We did not choose to support Harris and Walz because we thought they were mascots of our faith. We chose them because our faith commands us to do and not do certain actions. Harris and Walz better reflect our spiritual values, as well as our family values ​​and existence.

I spent November 5th drifting between depression and dissociation – while doing all my motherly duties. The day continued as usual: a doctor’s appointment, volunteering at a child’s school, laundry and sports practice after school. My minibus drove around the city. I sipped coffee, took the dog for a quick walk, and waited for my kids’ school buses. I saw some posts on social media saying that life will go on as usual – but I don’t believe it. Not for my family. Not for my children.

I am filled with a sad rage that cannot be put into words. When I think about what is at stake and how it affects the communities I am a part of, I am devastated. IVF coverage and options – including for breast cancer survivors and infertile people. Education – especially for those in liberal states and those with disabled children who rely on IEPs and 504s. Safety – for women, people of color, LGBTQIA people, veterans, disabled, children, seniors.

The election of a deranged, crooked, cognitively declining, privileged male bully is so incredibly dangerous to almost every American – and yet here we are. There is no justification.

The reality is that we simply feel not only rejected and unseen, but also violated and vulnerable. We were cautiously optimistic that America was ready to turn away from hate, exclusion and selective privilege and toward unity, integration and progress. “Liberty and justice” have once again been reserved for a select few, resulting in the majority of Americans having declining protections and freedoms that, at least for now, not only keep us safe but allow us to thrive.

Mickey Guyton, a black country music, Grammy-nominated artist, has a song called “What are you going to tell her??” I ask you to listen or read the lyrics (but have the tissues handy). She eloquently expresses how many of us feel right now, especially when we talk to our daughters.

I won’t end with a cheesy platitude. I have no answers. I’m grieving, like many of you, and I’m feeling a little lost, broken, and scared. I believe that in the coming days these will give way to righteous anger … but, more importantly, evolve into a new determination to keep fighting for what all people deserve, including the four most important people in my life.