ARRIVING home after an afternoon at the beauty salon, Heather Hopkins did a twirl for her partner, Joe Gibbs.
“Notice anything different?” she asked, while a bemused Joe gave her the once-over.
“Erm, your nails are a different colour?” he ventured.
Nodding, Heather, now 30, didn’t mention the Botox and filler she’d just been injected with on the sly.
A secret tweaker, she’d been indulging in injectables for the past four years – and her partner had absolutely no idea.
“I was spending £1.3k a year on Botox and filler and Joe was none the wiser,” says Heather, a charity fundraiser from Port Talbot, South Wales.
“Joe always complimented me on my ‘natural’ good looks, never suspecting that my secret Saturday jabs were the reason behind my high cheekbones and unlined face.
“But as far as I’m concerned, injectables are an essential part of my self-care and none of his business!
“It’s about self-confidence, not vanity, and I plan on ageing on my own terms – not nature’s.”
Like Heather, more and more women are now committing ‘cosmetic infidelity’. According to EuroNews, around 900k Botox jabs are currently carried out in the UK each year, although it’s not clear how many are done in secret without their partners knowing.
Some secret tweakers say they are not bothered by the little white lie, and like Heather don’t feel the need to justify their self-care routine.
Others feel that societal pressure to look naturally ‘wrinkle-free’ means they have to keep their injections and surgeries to themselves.
“You go on Instagram, and everyone looks fabulous,” says Heather.
“There is so much pressure to look like your ‘Insta-self’ that some of my mates refuse to tell their best pals how much Botox and filler they have. Even celebrities won’t come clean about their procedures.”
Heather started having Botox and fillers aged 25, in 2015.
“It might sound young but I had an uneven jawline which had bothered me since I was teen.
“I decided at 25 I was old enough and had enough research was right for me to start, as I didn’t want to wait until any wrinkles had developed.
“I believe subtle prevention is better than cure.
“I’d seen the results of regular jabs on people, and realised if I had ‘little and often’ treatments, I’d get great results,” she says.
“I’d broken my nose at 12, which shattered my self-confidence, and had a £4K nose job at 18, followed by a revision two years later after a car accident for £2K. They showed me that cosmetic surgery – if done correctly – can change the way you feel about yourself.
Around the same time Heather met Joe, now 31, a golfing pro and coach, after he slid into her DMs. For the next four years, she kept her tweakments on the down-low, pretending she was just off for a manicure or wax any time she went to the beauticians.
In early 2019 Heather had more revision work on her nose to make it thinner, costing £4K. “Joe and I hadn’t moved in together at that stage,” she says, explaining how she was able to recover at home.
And it was at this point she told Joe about the surgery.
“I felt I should because there was bruising,” she says. “He said I didn’t need it but would always support me.”
The same year, she had composite veneers added to her top teeth costing £3K – but she didn’t tell Joe.
“A good smile is important to me and despite trying different whitening strips, I’d never managed to get a brilliant white smile,” she says.
My tweakments aren’t radical alterations, it’s just maintenance to help me make the best of myself
Heather Hopkins
“I was thrilled with the results.
“I finally told Joe and my pals because people were asking me why they looked so white.
“At the same time we moved in together. So I fessed up about my Botox and filler as well.
“I came home with a little bit of swelling from filler and told Joe what it was. He was blasé but baffled. He thought my looks were natural and said I didn’t need any extra work. He thought makeup would do the trick.
“He couldn’t see any difference. I just smiled and nodded as that was the response I was hoping for.
“My tweakments aren’t radical alterations, it’s just maintenance to help me make the best of myself.
“But he said it was a waste of money spending thousands on something like that. By that point, I’d spent more than £20k on nose jobs, Botox, fillers and dental work.
“But you can’t put a price on good self-esteem and body confidence.
“When I told him about breaking my nose so young and being bullied, he totally understood and supported my decisions.
HEATHER'S TWEAKMENTS
Botox: Four times a year – £800
FIller: Two times a year – £500
Nose job one: £4k
Nose job two: £2k
Nose job three: £2k
Nose job four: £2k
Composite veneers on teeth: £3k
TOTAL: £25.4k
“Now when I come home from a Botox or filler session, he just shakes his head.
“He reckons it’s not worth the money I spend because he can’t see any difference, but I do. As for the cost, it’s my money. I earn it and I save up for my treatments.
“Joe is golf-obsessed. He loves his clothes and spends money on his own version of looking good.
“I don’t mind how much he spends though. I just support self-care choice.
Some couples overshare, but in my opinion it’s better to preserve some mystery
Heather Hopkins
“I had a fourth nose job revision in 2020 costing £2k,” she says.
“Joe supported me while I recovered, He said I looked amazing before the fourth surgery. He’s baffled about why I think I need extra work done.
“Like many men Joe used to think tweakments would make you look like a monster. I’ve shown sensible tweakments don’t. Joe’s still convinced I don’t need any work.”
Although her tweakments are no longer secret, Heather firmly believes there are some things your partner definitely doesn’t need to know.
“Some couples overshare, but in my opinion it’s better to preserve some mystery,” she says.
“I could bore my man senseless with a blow-by-blow analysis of what concealer is better or where to have Botox but I reckon he’d run from the room screaming. Sometimes, less is more when it comes to what information to give them!”
Joe says: “I can’t notice the difference – Heather is gorgeous either way.
“Women and their beauty regime is a minefield. Just as long as she doesn’t go near my golf clubs.”
