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It took me years to get pregnant but I was disappointed when I found out I was having a boy…it doesn’t make me a bad mum

A MOTHER has revealed that she struggled to get pregnant with her second child, and was left hugely disappointed when she did, and found out she was having a boy. 

Char, a content creator and mum to two toddlers, explained that she felt “horrendous guilt” that she was unhappy with the gender, but confessed that this doesn’t make her a bad mum.

A mother has revealed that she was gutted when she found out she was pregnant with a baby boy
Char explained that she thought she was “destined to be a girl mum” and suffered with “horrendous guilt” after discovering her baby’s gender

In fact, the mother took to social media to reveal that gender disappointment is much “more common than you think”. 

Posting online, Char said: “I was so disappointed when I found out I was having a boy, I really thought I was destined to be a girl mum, and this is coming from a girl who suffered with infertility.”

She confessed: “The guilt I felt for even thinking that when I found out who is a boy, was horrendous.

“I’ll repeat again, it is okay to admit this – it doesn’t make you a bad mum, and it certainly doesn’t make you ungrateful.”

Char explained that she was “convinced” she was going to have another girl, after previously welcoming her first child, a daughter named Phoebe.

She shared that although she was gutted when she discovered she would be having a son, once she got her head “around it” and when he was born, she claimed that “everything fell into place.”

Regardless of her previous concerns, Char continued: “Although I didn’t see myself with a boy, I now couldn’t live without one.”

She described her son as the “apple of [her] eye” and admitted that she is “so lucky to have him.”

Reflecting on her initial worries, Char added: “And now I look back, I have no idea why I was disappointed or sad about it, because this little boy is my world, and I’m so glad that I had a little boy.”

She explained that she is “thankful” to now have “one of each”, and advised pregnant women not to worry about gender disappointment.

The mother explained that everything will be “ok” and things will “make sense” when the child is born. 

The TikTok clip, which was posted under the username @char.mumlife, has clearly left many open-mouthed, as it has quickly amassed 52,400 views. 

How to predict your baby’s gender at home


Many social media users could relate to Char, and were keen to express this in the comments. 

Sarah Barns On Being A Boy Mum

SARAH Barns, Associate Editor at Fabulous, has revealed why she loves being a mum to two boys.

Sarah explained: “I love being a mum to boys. From finding snails in my trainers to hearing them belt out the Paw Patrol theme tune at 5am, there is never a dull moment.

“While the level of energy they have can be completely exhausting at times, they’re always fun to be around.

“I like parenting someone who isn’t perceived as a mini-me.

“I’m not pinning all of my broken hopes and dreams on them like I fear I would if I had a girl.

“Also, boys’ toys are cool. Slime and ride-on fire engines? Yes please.

“And, dressing them feels easier – no tights, no elaborate hairdos, no must-have accessories.

“It’s a challenge to raise boys in this current world – yes, you can cry and wear pink, no, you cannot eat your brother’s lunch.

“But it’s one that is filled with an unlimited amount of love, joy and chaos.”

One person said: “100% it’s not the disappointment of them being who they are, it’s the disappointment of not/never having what you’ve pictured in your mind-sometimes your whole life!

“It’s like a type of grief.” 

I cried my eyes out when I found out I was having my second boy

TikTok user

Another added: “This is amazing for you saying this, should definitely be spoken about more!! I felt this when I found out it was twins, I wasn’t happy! But now I would never change it and I could never imagine.” 

A third commented: “I felt this so much.”

Meanwhile, another mother revealed: “I cried my eyes out when I found out I was having my second boy. I love my boys but wow it was overwhelming at the time.” 

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